oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
