Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Randomize
