Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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