is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
