No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
