and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
