just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Randomize
