well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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