Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
