I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
