He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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