he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
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