Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
