I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
