The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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