Soap is not a condiment
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
