i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
