man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
