wake up i wanna do it froggy style
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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