he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
