the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
