Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
