I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
