I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize