everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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