Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
