yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
