Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
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