We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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