we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
