Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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