i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
