I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
