apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Randomize
