How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
