The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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