is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
its not stalking. its research.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Randomize
