i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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