brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize