i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Quick, to the slutcave!
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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