I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Acid is not a monday night drug
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Randomize
