I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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