I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
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