i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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