margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
