The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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