You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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