Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I wear drunk well.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
