I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
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