How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Randomize
